New Year, New You…or just another fad

Me at a Cross Country Race

I have been taking a long time to think about what I want from 2016. January always seems to be a strange month; a mixture of everyone full of good intentions, trying to get through the hangover of Christmas and waiting for the first paycheque of the year to tide them over from an expensive December. It may be a cynical way to look at the year, but it’s not helped by the range of diet books promising to help you become a new improved version of yourself. I’m not disputing whether these diet books help or not, I’m not qualified to make that decision, but I always find it fascinating that these books are launched at this time of year. It seems we go through a ritual each year of saying that we are going to finally change all our bad habits and become a new person.

The reason I have taken this point of view is after an event that happened whilst I was running home from work. I was doing one of my easy runs and ran past a pub near me. I was quite focussed on just getting the run done, as I was pretty tired that day, when I thought I noticed an old man stumble out of the pub and nearly fall over. I am ashamed to say that I fell into the familiar trap that seems to haunt the people of London that is noticing something that has gone wrong- or where one could help- but being too scared to act upon that moment of compassion we feel. Luckily my sense of duty kicked in and I turned round to see if the old man was alright; another person had also decided to help the old man too. It turned out he had a few pints, had somehow lost his sister and was feeling unwell. He had stumbled out to try and get home. The other person and I helped him up. By luck this other person lived near where the old man resided and insisted on taking him; I was able to offer directions to where the old man lived. I felt a mixture of emotions; ashamed that I had not stopped and humbled by the act of kindness the other person had exhibited. It sparked in me the thought that what good is it to achieve a goal- in my case running the London Marathon- and lose your values along the way, e.g. nearly not helping an old man because I was too focussed on my own goal.

That’s why I have come to have a certain scepticism towards New Year’s resolutions. From all the advertising, media and literature that comes out each January; I feel overwhelmed that I should set some lofty goal and transform myself into a completely new person. Though what happens if we cannot change our faults or that we do not even recognise our faults? How are we meant to do achieve these ‘special’ New Year resolutions if we haven’t been able  to truly appreciate ourselves for who we are and all the human frailties that each of us possess? I know this might all sound a bit cheesy and not very concrete as a blog post, but what I am trying to get at is how we can actually achieve a goal and possibly transform ourselves. This post is not trying to find the answer to it; I am simply trying to offer a counterbalance to the extreme motivational/ positive thinking, such as The Secret, that comes out at the start of each year. Rather than set ourselves a goal that is too hard to achieve we can focus on the everyday decisions or tasks, that over the long run can make us feel better or help us move in the right direction.  I am not saying this is easy or as simple as just setting a goal, but in the long run it may be more beneficial for us.

After some very limited, and I really do mean a very tiny amount of reading, I have come across a couple of sources that seem to support this idea. The first is a short video by author and podcaster, Rich Roll, about New Year’s Resolutions. It is not a very detailed video about New Year’s Resolutions, but what it does talk about is staying in the present and concentrating on making positive, small decisions that add up to a bigger impact over time. I really like this because rather than thinking about something that is too far in the future, we can truly appreciate ourselves right in this very moment- warts and all as some would say.  Being in the present allows us to avoid being overwhelmed by the challenges life sets us, as well as not beat ourselves up for not being as good as we want to be- or what popular culture wants us to be. Furthermore staying in the present allows us to look at our faults compassionately, rather than just hoping that by starting some new sport or diet that all our faults from last year are just going to suddenly disappear. In fact, starting to find out what sort of behaviours we want to get rid of or understand more of; could be the best place for a New Year’s Resolution. The other piece of reading that has informed my thinking is a Guardian article on ‘false hope’ syndrome. It is essentially a follow on from Rich Roll’s video and shows how we should avoid setting ourselves up to fail. Instead arguing that we should see how feasible a goal is and then break it down into small, manageable tasks that we know we can achieve- thus building momentum for overall positive change.

So if you have got this far into the post, you may be asking yourself how I am going to enact this information for myself? I suppose for me it is about valuing how I achieve a goal as much as completing the goal itself. So what I mean is thinking about my behaviour as much as the goals I want to achieve this year. After the incident with the old man I have come up with four behaviours that I would like to work on, which are: patience to deal with any set-backs along the way with my running training, gratitude for being able to take part in running with a great club, the courage to try new types of training/ races -as well as being able to pick myself up when things go wrong- and to stop trying to control every outcome by letting go and enjoying the journey. I know these are traits that are easier said than done, but like helping the old man at the beginning of the story I hope it is something I can practice on a daily basis.

As for my goals, so far I have already started to do a lot of them, but here they are so I can look back on them over the year:

·         Have taken part in my first Park Run.

·         Raced my first 10k.

·         Taken part in my Club’s cross-country races.

·         To follow my Club’s marathon training plan.

·         To enjoy the London Marathon and do the best I possible I can at this epic event.

·         Use my Leadership in Running Fitness Qualification this year.

·         Publishing one blog post a month.

I’m hoping these goals will keep me on the straight and narrow for 2016 and it would be great to hear what your milestones are for this year.